A Rant from Mark (InspiredFunk)

It was a morning when I felt less pride in being British than ever before (and believe me, while working as an entertainer in Greece and Holland, I saw enough of the British Abroad to cause me to lose most of my pride).

Front page of the news paper – “Britain is the Home of Bad Parents” – something which, despite my immediate “How dare they!!” reaction, in the cold light of day, could well be true.

When I look around my home town, I see a truly high density of “dysfunctional” families, and I realise that the norm is no longer Mum, Dad and the kids, its a single parent, transient partners and kids!

More than this, the structure of discipline and respect which once existed has all but been destroyed as communities have been broken down, and political correctness strives to remove all fear from life, forgetting that fear is a key component in learning and establishing baselines of behaviour.

This might sound a little controversial, particularly to the politically correct crowd who say you should never even shout at your child, or that Teachers have no right to discipline a child, but I will attempt to justify my position…..

I remember when I was about 4 or 5, on one of my first trips to pre-school, I spent the first hour or so crying, after burning my arm on one of the impossibly hot School radiators hanging on the wall in our room. For the rest of my school life, this was not a mistake I made again, and when I did want to touch a radiator, perhaps to warm my hands, even up to date, I am more tentative and realise I need to test the heat before sticking my arm straight to it. This is because, that first time, the pain made me afraid to do it again – fear played a big part in establishing a behaviour pattern which would continue through the rest of my life.
OK – granted this is a bizarre example, but it was one of the simplest, I felt, which illustrated the importance of fear in gaining a respect for things around you and how you interact with them….

Jump forward a few years, young Mark lurking around in middle school, caught for some minor theft and waiting for punishment. My father had slapped me a few times as a child, and that stinging in my legs is still there when I think about it. I am not saying he beat me – he didn’t, but he slapped me, it stung, and I did not want to have it happen again, so, just like the radiator, I became aware and afraid of the consequence of disobeying my father or overstepping the ethical boundaries of the household. My eventual punishment for the minor theft was another slap, and a good few weeks grounding – I was angry, rebellious, but had enough fear and respect (probably from the early “lashing”) to obey my punishment, and whilst I may not have sincerely said “sorry” and may even have lay in bed thinking about how much I hated my parents for a while, I then knew the consequences of my actions, and that if I did it again, it would be worse…

I was not a particularly good kid – I was polite, perhaps even bright – but this was tempered by a need to excite life and my wrong-doings included everything from breaking and entering, vandalism, theft, grand larceny … and, I honestly believe that if I had not had the “fear” of consequence put into me, I would have strayed far further from the straight and narrow, and would probably now either be in prison, or dead.

But it was not just my father and mother who looked after me – the community was also playing a role. Teachers had power – power, not only to talk to your parents (bringing in the base “fear”), but also to punish. Police Officers too, could drag you home to your parents – something they would not dare to do today.

WE have broken down society – political correctness, never saying the wrong thing, never wanting anyone to be “fearful”, or taking away basic tools from parents disabling them from getting the right ethical and moral lessons to their children. Nowadays you could not slap your child’s legs like my father used to do mine in public without someone reporting you to the Child Protection Agency!
We have taken power away from our teachers – are “all inclusive” approach to education plants the uncontrollable with those who wish to learn, with little or no power given to the teacher to discipline the uncontrollable – worse than this, we have seen complaints made and upheld against teachers for taking a stand, even against physical violence.

We have removed the powers of our Police – thinking we are making life better by complicating law by defining hundreds of new crime categories and sub-categories to excuse the inexcusable, increasing the paperwork and barriers to conviction faced by the officers. More legal loopholes for minimising punishment have been opened, the only beneficiaries being the criminals and the legal representatives.

Our kids are not respectful, or fearful of consequence from the Police, many seeing them as a target for pointless abuse rather than a resource to call on in times of trouble (it’s easier to reach for a knife!). Long gone are the days when the local bobby would drag you home to your parents by your ear!!

Our nanny state removes the power of parents to utilise fear as one of the tools in their arsenal. Fear of consequence has gone – in fact, more than this, many kids know exactly how far they can push the law and how well “protected” they are. Our Police no longer have the respect that they deserve, but then they do not have the powers that they need.

What can I say – I am sorry, I am not politically correct – I do not agree that no action is the best action, that I should hide or disguise something which is right and true because of political sensibilities. I do not believe in the Nanny State which Britain has become – telling me how to raise my children when, if you look at the record of the past 30 years, the Government has not exactly achieved improved citizenship or inclusion (two of their key targets) and the rate of marriage failure and births to single parents (with all its additional cost to the economy and me as an individual) is ever on the increase. People are more isolated, children grow without either the family network or the real life social network required to develop those skills which make us “civilised”, and slowly, every day on the streets of Britain more of our children die, killed by other children, why? Because they have a cause to fight for? No! Because they have nothing to do? No! Because society has become dependent on constant excitement and the desire to “get rich quick”? Probably!